Feeling a bit green today... For the last few days I have had the worst tooth ache! To be honest, it was worse than waiting for the appointment to get my wisdom teeth out, and they HAD to come out as they were all yucky.. Anyways, I was thinking, my top left hand side teeth were moving as the wisdom are now gone, the problem is my eye tooth was hitting my very front tooth and had no where to go!! So here I was popping every pain killer under the sun every 1 hour or so.. soo not good for the body and all, and nothing would stop the pain! Finally got into a dentist on Sat morning. And as I could have told him, there was no holes or anything up there to cause the pain.. so what was it? Where they moving with no where to go?? A couple of xrays later, bring on the needle! Was shaking and all. you have no idea how much I hate the dentist!! Anyways, turns out that I had the start of an ulcer or something UP in the root area of my eye tooth!!! He had to drill a massive hole, dig it out with the huge needle thing and boy did it smell!! It was all infected. Apparently it was caused through my tooth being hit by something or it moving too quickly. Never trust my dreams again - mind you, this time the one about all my front teeth falling out was right in both departments! Soo, I'm on pain meds, go back on Monday next week to get the gauze thingee taken out and the hole patched up and hopefully the dentist saved my tooth. He may have to take it out after all this - which is bad as it is a front one!
Food wise, as you can imagine - anything soft. From ice cream, to mashed up veggies; I'm eating slightly like a baby.. yummy.. Scales were nice last week - a loss of 400grams which brings me UNDER 95!!! I am 94.7 YAY!! Am happy about that one. Downward scales heading towards the 80's and I can see that lovely number in sight. Cant wait, have been focused enough to do extra cardio in the gym whilst on my weights days and plus am back walking with Raylene. I'm determined to hit my 90 mark come the end of winter, which is still realistic if not easy as we are about 5-6 weeks away..
Miss 8 will be Miss 9 next Friday. Nothing big planned, bbq maybe and that's also to welcome the new concrete under the new patio roof!Now just need to sought the gardens and nicky pots and we done.
the old and the new...
the old and the new...
Miss 8's creative streak..
The reason behind "Raykel"
Sunday, 15 July 2007
Monday, 2 July 2007
July..
18 Days till my Miss 8 becomes Miss 9! Gees how time does fly! Not always when you are having fun as they say either. It has been a hard 12 plus months with her, but I do have days where I think we may be getting somewhere! So, have no idea what we will do, something small and for the family only I think. She doesnt really have any great friends here, so I'm not sure if she will want to do anything. PLus it all depends on if Ray is working as well. It will take us a little while to catch up after him having most likely a month off work!
Today is awful. Not the day, outside it is how it should be in June July here. Sunny and warm. Inside- cool and cold, needing a blanket. I have no energy. I havent done for a week or so, just ran dry. Is annoying as I needed to keep my numbers heading downwards as there is now only 2 months till the end of winter and I would love to be knocking doors on the 80's. TTOM doesnt help either though. All I want to do is sleep and eat. Went outside, cut a few dead roses off, took clothes off the line, watered some plants and that was it. Enough. Started well with the eating - scrambled eggs with mushroom, onion and ham on wholegrain toast - followed by Rays pancakes and little cakes! ARG!! Hate it when I do that! Havent got to the gym for 3 days or even a walk, so even the exercise is lacking! So with the excess fluid and no gym work, I am not expecting a nice number this week. To be honest, I'd be happy to stay the same!
Went to the Townsville show. Was good, the girls liked it. We took them on as many rides and games as we could. These things are just so expensive! They seems to enjoy the showbags they got and the prizes they won. We were there for around 5 hours and poor Miss 4 couldnt keep her little eyes open by the end, she fell asleep on the walk back to the car. Made sure we had lunch before we left so we didnt have to spend money on food.. As you can see by the balloons, we ended up with 10! I just kept telling Miss 8 to keep getting them; they were free!!! So the boot was full and the girls thought it was great! I missed having the big balloons with all the teddys and stuff in them though, that was a shame as I would have liked to have got one for them. Maccas for dinner on the way home, I was not cooking after a day like that!
Today is awful. Not the day, outside it is how it should be in June July here. Sunny and warm. Inside- cool and cold, needing a blanket. I have no energy. I havent done for a week or so, just ran dry. Is annoying as I needed to keep my numbers heading downwards as there is now only 2 months till the end of winter and I would love to be knocking doors on the 80's. TTOM doesnt help either though. All I want to do is sleep and eat. Went outside, cut a few dead roses off, took clothes off the line, watered some plants and that was it. Enough. Started well with the eating - scrambled eggs with mushroom, onion and ham on wholegrain toast - followed by Rays pancakes and little cakes! ARG!! Hate it when I do that! Havent got to the gym for 3 days or even a walk, so even the exercise is lacking! So with the excess fluid and no gym work, I am not expecting a nice number this week. To be honest, I'd be happy to stay the same!
Went to the Townsville show. Was good, the girls liked it. We took them on as many rides and games as we could. These things are just so expensive! They seems to enjoy the showbags they got and the prizes they won. We were there for around 5 hours and poor Miss 4 couldnt keep her little eyes open by the end, she fell asleep on the walk back to the car. Made sure we had lunch before we left so we didnt have to spend money on food.. As you can see by the balloons, we ended up with 10! I just kept telling Miss 8 to keep getting them; they were free!!! So the boot was full and the girls thought it was great! I missed having the big balloons with all the teddys and stuff in them though, that was a shame as I would have liked to have got one for them. Maccas for dinner on the way home, I was not cooking after a day like that!
Wednesday, 27 June 2007
The big 20..
Oh to be able to say that and be talking about my age and not my weight loss.. 20.2 gone! Forever! I mean it this time, no going back, I hate looking the way I did and thinking that I looked okay - but in reality didn't! I hated sitting on the couch and having my legs spreading so much that they don't fit in a outdoor chair! I can do that now... sit in an outdoor chair and have room! I don't get up and have the marks of the chair digging in to my legs! Oh it feels soooo good! Still along way to go, about 20 something more, but the next thing for me is 15k with WW..
This month, was a good month. I changed to core and have not had a gain all month! Yes, I many have only had a .1 loss last week, but that was coming off a 1.7 and a .8 - cant expect big numbers all the time. And lets face it, .5 is a healthy amount to lose. So I'm happy with that.
I eat different, I work out different - I push myself to work harder. I never used to, I was to lazy to do anything for myself and then wonder why I was fat!? How do we get in our heads that we are not? I must admit, I did not own a mirror that was full length in my house. I soo want to now! I want to go out and party hard like when I was 20! Okay. I was most likely another 10 kilo lighter, but still - I used to dance all night and not get exhausted!
I'm happy! Can you tell! I cant wait to tell everyone that I finally have hit the 20 mark! Its been so long coming... I did it - that's 20 less that I have to lose! Bring it on!
This month, was a good month. I changed to core and have not had a gain all month! Yes, I many have only had a .1 loss last week, but that was coming off a 1.7 and a .8 - cant expect big numbers all the time. And lets face it, .5 is a healthy amount to lose. So I'm happy with that.
I eat different, I work out different - I push myself to work harder. I never used to, I was to lazy to do anything for myself and then wonder why I was fat!? How do we get in our heads that we are not? I must admit, I did not own a mirror that was full length in my house. I soo want to now! I want to go out and party hard like when I was 20! Okay. I was most likely another 10 kilo lighter, but still - I used to dance all night and not get exhausted!
I'm happy! Can you tell! I cant wait to tell everyone that I finally have hit the 20 mark! Its been so long coming... I did it - that's 20 less that I have to lose! Bring it on!
Saturday, 23 June 2007
brrr..
Its another cold miserable day in sunny Nth Qld... This week we had our lowest ever daytime temp - 13.4.. brrr, froze me tits off! A least the rain is good, cleaning everything and making it all green again.
Ray is still home, he has an interview with Orica the week school goes back. He would like to get that job, as it will let him "blow shit up".. Men and their weird ideas of fun! Hes been pretty good with the food side of things, and that reminds me I should really do some cooking for the week or I will blow out!
Mum ended up in hospital this week, kidney stones. She was only in for the morning, but it was a big drama as she never told anyone. Dad rang me from Mackay in a panic wanting to know what was going on! I didnt even know! Everything turned out fine and she was home after lunch.
Emotional wise this week has been pretty blasay. Not much screaming, not much of anything really . Nice and quiet. I am getting used to Ray being home and wouldnt mind it staying like that... but I know it wont as he like being away and having two differnt lives Im sure.
Ray is still home, he has an interview with Orica the week school goes back. He would like to get that job, as it will let him "blow shit up".. Men and their weird ideas of fun! Hes been pretty good with the food side of things, and that reminds me I should really do some cooking for the week or I will blow out!
Mum ended up in hospital this week, kidney stones. She was only in for the morning, but it was a big drama as she never told anyone. Dad rang me from Mackay in a panic wanting to know what was going on! I didnt even know! Everything turned out fine and she was home after lunch.
Emotional wise this week has been pretty blasay. Not much screaming, not much of anything really . Nice and quiet. I am getting used to Ray being home and wouldnt mind it staying like that... but I know it wont as he like being away and having two differnt lives Im sure.
Wednesday, 20 June 2007
Hump day
Its hump day. A huge loss this week - .1 could have been worse, my sister was walking behind me as we walked into the weightwatchers room and picked it up as I walked through the doors.. :)
DH is still home, not sure when he is going back to work. He has put his paper work in for Lake Lindsay, I guess we are just waiting on a date. I like having him home - just he brings all the naughty foods into the house and I eat them! So, true to form, they here - I eat them, I have a bad loss or gain.. This week !! Told him NO MORE JUNK IN THE HOUSE!! Its my frankenstien foods... expecially chocolate... last nights effort - 4 squares of white followed by a whole flake bar. Real great Kel! Right before a WI too,, knew what I was doing - BUT just had to eat it! Felt shit afterwards too, but - lets do better this week.
My knee is still playing up, taking it easy and trying a few different things to see if I can push it without hurting myself.
Slighly annoyed; tried to get miss 8 - neally 9 - into see a child shrink.. like a matter of urgency as I am about to lose my mind.. July 26,, thats the first appointment I can get her into see someone. Obviuosly they didnt understand when I said that Olga wanted her in quickly to see someone. Here is a child that is so angry that he only voice level is SCREAMing at someone with complete annoyance in her voice. How can I help her? I dont have the skills to help myself at the best of time let alone a 9 year old that is desperate... The way our health system is with our kids is barbaric to say the least. Unless you are completly disabled then you dont count. You are not important enough to fix and you and your family is left to fight your way through the under knowlegle school system and health system. She is under the care of a specialist from Brisbane whom she sees every 6 months, how can that help and treat her?? All he wants is a speechy and medication - no other offer of help or ideas in how I can improve her life! Does he not understand that this here and now will effect the rest of her life? So for now I have to try and deal with the tears and screaming matches until she is able to see someone... on July 26th..
DH is still home, not sure when he is going back to work. He has put his paper work in for Lake Lindsay, I guess we are just waiting on a date. I like having him home - just he brings all the naughty foods into the house and I eat them! So, true to form, they here - I eat them, I have a bad loss or gain.. This week !! Told him NO MORE JUNK IN THE HOUSE!! Its my frankenstien foods... expecially chocolate... last nights effort - 4 squares of white followed by a whole flake bar. Real great Kel! Right before a WI too,, knew what I was doing - BUT just had to eat it! Felt shit afterwards too, but - lets do better this week.
My knee is still playing up, taking it easy and trying a few different things to see if I can push it without hurting myself.
Slighly annoyed; tried to get miss 8 - neally 9 - into see a child shrink.. like a matter of urgency as I am about to lose my mind.. July 26,, thats the first appointment I can get her into see someone. Obviuosly they didnt understand when I said that Olga wanted her in quickly to see someone. Here is a child that is so angry that he only voice level is SCREAMing at someone with complete annoyance in her voice. How can I help her? I dont have the skills to help myself at the best of time let alone a 9 year old that is desperate... The way our health system is with our kids is barbaric to say the least. Unless you are completly disabled then you dont count. You are not important enough to fix and you and your family is left to fight your way through the under knowlegle school system and health system. She is under the care of a specialist from Brisbane whom she sees every 6 months, how can that help and treat her?? All he wants is a speechy and medication - no other offer of help or ideas in how I can improve her life! Does he not understand that this here and now will effect the rest of her life? So for now I have to try and deal with the tears and screaming matches until she is able to see someone... on July 26th..
Wednesday, 13 June 2007
Home Early..
What a suprise to be sitting watching the State of Origin with my mum... the dog (Dudley) runs to the door, not making a sound. The door makes a sound of something maybe climbing on it. Dudley then starts turning himself in circles. I thought the cat was at the door! By Dudley's body language he knows who ever is at the door. The next thing I know, a man in a orange and stripe shirt looking very tired walks in the door and around the corner to make an appearance in the lounge room.. Ray is home! He was not due home till tomorrow night... He has been made redunant from his mine site in Moura.
He was sopossed to be there a few more weeks (stints), have some time off then most likely start at Lake Lindsay which is about 280km closer to Townsville. When I asked him why he was home, his reply was "the boss argued with me to much so I picked him up and threw him through the window!" Gees, I just stared at him waiting for him to flinch on his story and start laughing. Anyone who knows Ray, knows that this is just not in his nature. He had a straight face the whole complete time... I just kept looking at him - asking him ; your joking??!! Then after around 5 mins, he smiled, sat down next to me and said, Nah been made reduntant. By this time next week about 100 blokes would have lost their jobs. The site is still going strong, its just that what they are doing is finished. They are just no longer required. SOOOO now, its back on the unemployment list.... Back to centrelink to start the fight about money!!
So, now I cant give up work. I was going to cut right back as it was just not worth the stressing and trying to deal with miss 8, work and the house. Least I have a job to go to so we can still survive a little.
Enough of that.. Dramas of everyday life that just happen unexpectedly! Weight in this morning. Loss of .8, taking my total to 19.6! Just .4 to go and then its the big 20!!! That like half way! Pleased with that, as its my 2nd week on core and I wasnt exactly very good. Like - pizza, cheese cake, choc coated bickies etc etc... I know, I know!!! Its my choice to put them in my mouth.. and I fully accept that! Dont think for a moment that if I eat like that then I will be sitting in a corner crying over a gain. I wont be! If I cause it by not eating right or not doing enough exercise then its totally my fault! However, the next day or the next meal I will be right back where I should be - knowing this is the only way to get where I WANT and NEED to be! Gymed today, did my fitness routine with the instructer - so I know what I should be doing. Bring it on and watch the shape now change.. LOL
GO THE MAROONS!! Boring game. No game 3 now, as Qld won 10-6. Still confused why Matty Bowen was not in the team... Best player in the league and he not there. Mind you, that is a good thing because then he is still nice and fit for the Cowboys in the coming games!
He was sopossed to be there a few more weeks (stints), have some time off then most likely start at Lake Lindsay which is about 280km closer to Townsville. When I asked him why he was home, his reply was "the boss argued with me to much so I picked him up and threw him through the window!" Gees, I just stared at him waiting for him to flinch on his story and start laughing. Anyone who knows Ray, knows that this is just not in his nature. He had a straight face the whole complete time... I just kept looking at him - asking him ; your joking??!! Then after around 5 mins, he smiled, sat down next to me and said, Nah been made reduntant. By this time next week about 100 blokes would have lost their jobs. The site is still going strong, its just that what they are doing is finished. They are just no longer required. SOOOO now, its back on the unemployment list.... Back to centrelink to start the fight about money!!
So, now I cant give up work. I was going to cut right back as it was just not worth the stressing and trying to deal with miss 8, work and the house. Least I have a job to go to so we can still survive a little.
Enough of that.. Dramas of everyday life that just happen unexpectedly! Weight in this morning. Loss of .8, taking my total to 19.6! Just .4 to go and then its the big 20!!! That like half way! Pleased with that, as its my 2nd week on core and I wasnt exactly very good. Like - pizza, cheese cake, choc coated bickies etc etc... I know, I know!!! Its my choice to put them in my mouth.. and I fully accept that! Dont think for a moment that if I eat like that then I will be sitting in a corner crying over a gain. I wont be! If I cause it by not eating right or not doing enough exercise then its totally my fault! However, the next day or the next meal I will be right back where I should be - knowing this is the only way to get where I WANT and NEED to be! Gymed today, did my fitness routine with the instructer - so I know what I should be doing. Bring it on and watch the shape now change.. LOL
GO THE MAROONS!! Boring game. No game 3 now, as Qld won 10-6. Still confused why Matty Bowen was not in the team... Best player in the league and he not there. Mind you, that is a good thing because then he is still nice and fit for the Cowboys in the coming games!
Monday, 11 June 2007
Stood up..
I am sitting here waiting to talk to my DH. We had a "date" tonight on msn as he is away at work. 8.30 has been and gone. He must have gone to bed. I know that I shouldnt feel so awful towards him as he does do long days, but still, cant he find the time to stay up 15 mins and have a quick chat before going to bed? He works in a mine - he is away 10 days then home for 4. Right now to be honest, we arnt good either. Its tough and Im left wondering if I can see the end of the year like this or if its going to get better.
I went roller skating today, second time since the beginning of the year.. Was good, shoved miss 4 off to my mums and then myself and miss 8 went. It only took me 10-15 mins to get going and I didnt fall down once! So much better than last time! And the best thing, a whole 13 bonus points!!! My legs I tell you were thinking that they were weighlifting! Mind you, think about it - really! They are lifting about 5 kilo everytime you take your foot off the floor.. I rekon about 200 squats would be equilavant.
I have added a terrible photo. When my dig camera has new batteries, I shall take it off and put a better one. Must put that in my memory bank for tomorrow.. Otherwise it will be too late and I will have lost all this weight with no "ongoing" photos! I want to be able to look back at what I have achieved. This is proof that I can do it, I can do anything if I put my mind to it! I will not give up, not this time, I want the swimsuit in summer that I will be proud to wear at the beach with the kids. I want those nice flimsy summer dresses that fly all over when the wind blows! I want that sexy underware to make my husband squirm and I would love to feel good to be able to dance in the sexy manner I so like to. And I will, mark my words; I will!
Food wise is okay, I have one point left till wednesday - my fault. I ate pizza for dinner the other night and I just couldnt stop! It was so yummy and the air was so cold. Plus, the chocolate.... the naughties that I dont usually have (or so I tell myself) - really must stop lying to myself. Was at mums and dads last night for dinner, they had cheesecake from the cheesecake shop.. "One wont hurt" they said! It does when I dont have the points; but.. caved in and had some. Was nice, but really didnt need it. Ive never been good with peer pressure. I didnt do drugs, or drink - but I am one of these people who likes to please everyone. I like having friends and if that means at times that I do something that I dont normally do, then so be it! I will do it. Within reason. That has been my whole life. Afraid of being alone and having no one. Is this why I am still in the relationship that has not changed in 5 years and will most likely never?
I have booked an appointment with the gp, I need some assistance with keeping my head straight with DD miss 8. She is ADD and SID and at times I could just strangle her! So, off to get some tips and ideas.. Thats not till the 18th though. I am also thinking of giving a day of work up. This should help with the stress level, but at the same time I need to get motivated to actually get off my bum and do somthing around here! How can I get up DH for not wanting to do anything when hes on days off and yet Im here all the time and I dont want to do anything... Really! Who am I kidding?
God I feel as though i could dribble on and on tonight... Better not, thoughts just keep running through my head - one day they will dissapear and all make sense.
I went roller skating today, second time since the beginning of the year.. Was good, shoved miss 4 off to my mums and then myself and miss 8 went. It only took me 10-15 mins to get going and I didnt fall down once! So much better than last time! And the best thing, a whole 13 bonus points!!! My legs I tell you were thinking that they were weighlifting! Mind you, think about it - really! They are lifting about 5 kilo everytime you take your foot off the floor.. I rekon about 200 squats would be equilavant.
I have added a terrible photo. When my dig camera has new batteries, I shall take it off and put a better one. Must put that in my memory bank for tomorrow.. Otherwise it will be too late and I will have lost all this weight with no "ongoing" photos! I want to be able to look back at what I have achieved. This is proof that I can do it, I can do anything if I put my mind to it! I will not give up, not this time, I want the swimsuit in summer that I will be proud to wear at the beach with the kids. I want those nice flimsy summer dresses that fly all over when the wind blows! I want that sexy underware to make my husband squirm and I would love to feel good to be able to dance in the sexy manner I so like to. And I will, mark my words; I will!
Food wise is okay, I have one point left till wednesday - my fault. I ate pizza for dinner the other night and I just couldnt stop! It was so yummy and the air was so cold. Plus, the chocolate.... the naughties that I dont usually have (or so I tell myself) - really must stop lying to myself. Was at mums and dads last night for dinner, they had cheesecake from the cheesecake shop.. "One wont hurt" they said! It does when I dont have the points; but.. caved in and had some. Was nice, but really didnt need it. Ive never been good with peer pressure. I didnt do drugs, or drink - but I am one of these people who likes to please everyone. I like having friends and if that means at times that I do something that I dont normally do, then so be it! I will do it. Within reason. That has been my whole life. Afraid of being alone and having no one. Is this why I am still in the relationship that has not changed in 5 years and will most likely never?
I have booked an appointment with the gp, I need some assistance with keeping my head straight with DD miss 8. She is ADD and SID and at times I could just strangle her! So, off to get some tips and ideas.. Thats not till the 18th though. I am also thinking of giving a day of work up. This should help with the stress level, but at the same time I need to get motivated to actually get off my bum and do somthing around here! How can I get up DH for not wanting to do anything when hes on days off and yet Im here all the time and I dont want to do anything... Really! Who am I kidding?
God I feel as though i could dribble on and on tonight... Better not, thoughts just keep running through my head - one day they will dissapear and all make sense.
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